Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Men's Guide

So over at the Babycenter Bargin Board there was an insulting article about woman and sex....won't even bother with posting that one as it is insulting to all of us. On the other hand a smart cookie over there made her own Top Ten list for men. I copied it below. Very nice and true. So it to your men ladies.

1. No one wants to have sex with someone who acts like a child. Fulfill your responsibilities to your children and wife without her having to nag, and she won't feel like your mother.

2. Come home from work on time. And if you are going to work 3 hours late, tell her. No one finds someone sexy when the mental images she has of him are either of him smeared on the pavement or busy in someone else's bed.

3. Make her feel appreciated--and a slap on the azz doesnt count. Remember how she couldn't wait to hop in bed when you were dating? That is because you were still courting her and making her want to want you.

4. Sometimes, one more person touching her is TOOOOO much. So if she is home with small children all day, give her a break from the children when you get home. Some time to recover from having everyone need something from her every moment of the day will get you a long way.

5. Going south too soon. Do not “pass go and collect $200.” Diving in for the genitals too soon usually isn’t the best idea. A woman needs to be properly aroused before any below-the-belt action feels good.
Be sure to focus on her entire body — head to toe — before going for the gold.
6. Don't expect reciprocation every time. Don't go south only in hopes of getting a blow job. We KNOW when that's really what you had in mind.

7. Provide--make her feel secure. Step up like a man and ask for a raise, if you need one. Or look for a job that will provide for your family. If you are the type to chase rainbows, don't keep falling into the same financial pits again and again. Yes, it is old fashioned. But nothing worries a woman more than not feeling like her nest and her chicks are safe.

8. Skid marks are not sexy. Neither are sunny-side-up tighty whities in the bathroom or bedroom floor. She will find your underwear (and what's inside) a LOT sexier if she doesn't see your underwear alllll day long.

9. Continue to be the Handsome Prince here to save the day--when you get home from work, save her from the children. It isn't excited as slaying the dragons, but when you've been home with them for ten hours, they begin to LOOK like dragons.

10. Don't expect her not to expect you to grow up and change. If life changes and you stay the same, that makes you as obsolete as the Nintendo 64 in your garage.

Written by Gretchen from BBC BHB.


Aunt Becky said...

#8 is my favorite!